


Maybe I just have to guard both your names.

by Anonymous



Category: ENHYPEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst??, How Do I Tag, M/M, Names, Soul Bond, Sunghoon almost thought that he fell inlove with the wrong person, idk just enjoy this plz, the other members i forgot to mention them cries
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-07
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-13 13:14:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29901612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Everyone has two names to guard; their own and the name that appears on their wrist, the name of their soulmate.
Relationships: Lee Heeseung & Park Sunghoon, Lee Heeseung/Park Sunghoon, Mentioned Shim Jaeyun | Jake/Park Jongseong | Jay
Comments: 1
Kudos: 47
Collections: Anonymous





	Maybe I just have to guard both your names.

Names have always been important to humans. A way to define us both to ourselves and others. A way of identifying, a way of recognising oneself. Powerful things are names, no wonder some cultures believed they had a magic to them. They were you, the only part of you that could be spoken by others, seen by them, used by them.

When Sunghoon was a child his grandmother would tell him that he ever met a fairy he was never to tell them his name. When Sunghoon asked why his grandmother said the fairy might steal it and with it, him, away to a far off land. He was the keeper of his name and he had to guard it, to keep it safe.

Sunghoon guarded his name fiercely. He didn’t mind when people called him Hoonie, they were just making a personal addition to his name. It didn't give them ownership over him. He was still Sunghoon, still spoke his name to define himself.

When he was thirteen he became guardian of another name. For whilst each person had their own name they were also gifted another. The name of their soulmate. Sunghoon's own name would one day find itself a literal part of another person, the same person who now was a bit of Sunghoon.

Some theorists felt that the names that appeared in black ink on a person’s wrist between the ages of ten and twenty were their own 'true' names, but Sunghoon didn't believe that. He was Park Sunghoon. He knew his name belonged to him; he felt it. The idea of not being Park Sunghoon was inconceivable. He was in that name as much as the letters and sounds words; his essence was Sunghoon.

Where then did that leave the Heeseung marked on his wrist?

At first he had been embarrassed, he had always thought it would be a girl's name, like Somi. Sunghoon was a common name so he assumed his soulmate would share that with him. Heeseung was not a rare name, well atleast that's what he knows but it was a boy's name and Sunghoon had never expected that.

Yeji of course liked having the name Lia on her wrist but then she'd always known her soulmate was female. Although the fact that Lia bore the name 'Yeji' didn't seem to matter as the writing was close enough.

For the next few years Sunghoon grew nervous of every Heeseung he met, and he did meet a few. One even had the name Sunghoon on his wrist but the handwriting was quite different to Sunghoon's relief. He didn't really know what he would have said if it had turned out they were a match.

When he joined the army Sunghoon found himself meeting the acquaintance of a Sergeant Chu Heeseung.

“Don’t panic, bro,” he said when he caught sight of Sunghoon's look. “I'm a Seung, not Heeseung. They will tell you that and,” he held up his uncovered wrist, “you really don't look like a Sooyoung to me.”

Sunghoon was relieved as the last thing he wanted was to find himself meeting his soulmate in the army where things were difficult enough. Sunghoon didn't fancy having met his soulmate in a war zone and seeing him blown up. And he knew it happened, he'd heard the stories.

Still maybe because Sunghoon bore Seung's 'official' name on his wrist they got on very well. They looked out for each other on and off duty. Sometimes, a bit drunk and giddy, John would call Seung, 'Heeseung'. His friend would reply, “You know, even after had a few pints you still don't look like a Sooyoung.”

Luckily their bond held through into India where Seung hauled a wounded Sunghoon back to cover.

“Couldn't let someone with my name on his wrist die, could I?” Seung said in the field hospital later. “Wouldn't be good for my ego.”

“Sooyoung's going to love you,” Sunghoon replied as they prepared to ship him out. “Keep yourself safe for her.”

“And you let me know when you meet your Heeseung,” Seung replied.

“I will,” Sunghoon said. He'd barely looked at his wrist whilst out in India, the name hidden under a wristband to avoid being a distraction. Now having come so close to death himself Sunghoon wondered if his Heeseung was already dead.

Then Park Sunghoon ended up in Korea and ended up meeting Lee Ethan.

If Sunghoon had been one to believe in fate he would have believed fate had brought him to Ethan. The chance meeting with Seoul, mentioning needing a flatmate, it seemed almost like divine intervention dragging Sunghoon out the loneliness he'd had since returning. It was as near to perfect as it could be.

After their first night together, even being abandoned and dragged halfway across Seoul, Sunghoon felt a bond with Ethan. Ethan was brilliant and fascinating and brought excitement. The only problem Sunghoon could see was that Ethan was a very different name to Heeseung.

He had brought up the soulmate name issue when they’d been sitting in the small cafe just across the street.

“So, do you have a soulmate?” Sunghoon asked.

“I have a name on my wrist, yes,” Ethan replied. It was covered with a thick, leather, expensive looking band. A contrast to the plain cloth band Sunghoon wore.

“And you haven't met them?”

“No.”

“You have met people with that name?”

“Yes, a lot of them.”

“But you're unattached like me?”

“Yes, Sunghoon-ah,” Ethan had replied. “Like you. Now we've established that we can go back to our cakes and coffee.”

Months went by, everything came and went, and Sunghoon never ceased to be amazed by Ethan. There were times when Ethan annoyed him, drove him mad with his silly experiments or thoughtlessness, but there were many more when Ethan made him laugh, or think or smile, or simply be amazed.

Each night Sunghoon found himself staring at his wrist and willing the name to change to Ethan but it didn't. It remained stubbornly Heeseung. The handwriting though, it looked so like Ethan's Sunghoon would swear it was his. But of course it couldn't be, Ethan was Ethan not Heeseung.

Sunghoon was falling in love with a person whose name he had no right to guard.

It was only after one particular event when Jake asked to see Sunghoon’s notes that something changed.

“This is your handwriting,” Jake mused.

“Yes.”

“Tell me, has Ethan ever shown you his wrist?”

“Why would he do that?” Sunghoon asked. Yes, there was a little part of him that hoped Ethan bore his name. If Sunghoon's name was guarded by Ethan he could live with the disappointment of his Heeseung.

“Ah, so he hasn't. And he hasn't seen yours?”

“No,” Sunghoon said.

“Let me see now.”

Sunghoon should have refused. Jake might not be a fairy but there was plenty he could do with names. Showing Jake might mean the end of all his hope.

“I just need to confirm something,” Jake said. “Or perhaps you would feel better if I guessed the name, on your wrist?”

“How could you guess it?” Sunghoon asked.

Jake leaned forward from where he lent against his desk. “I know the name of your wrist is Heeseung,” he said.

“How did you..? You can't have known that,” Sunghoon protested.

“Show me.”

The power of the name already lost Sunghoon uncovered his wrist, slightly embarrassed by his cheap and basic band, and held it out.

“A match,” Jake said.

“A match with who?” Sunghoon asked. Perhaps Jake had seen Sunghoon's writing on the wrist of some civil servant.

“To Lee Ethan Heeseung,” Jake said.

Sunghoon's heart threatened to break his ribcage. “Ethan's korean name is Heeseung?” he asked.

“Yes. Legally that's his name but he felt Heeseung was too boring and too common. You see he has a very common name on his wrist and he thought if he went by Heeseung then he would have trouble finding his soulmate, he still had a wish to find him then. He told everyone to only ever call him Ethan.”

Sunghoon swallowed. “When did he do that?” he asked.

“When he was seven years old,” Jake said. “After the name would have appeared on your wrist.”

Sunghoon looked his his wrist. Heeseung was Ethan before he was seven. The name he had borne then was the name Sunghoon had been given to guard. “I’ve never heard of that happening,” he said, his voice unsteady as hope flared. He would never see Ethan as a Heeseung but perhaps that didn't matter. Sunghoon guarded a piece of Ethan that was young and innocent.

“Oh it happens more often than you think,” Jake replied. “It took me months to persuade Jongseong that my given name was Jaeyun.”

“You?” Sunghoon couldn't picture Jake as anything mundane as a Jaeyun, just as he couldn't picture Ethan as anything as mundane as a Heeseung.

Jake smiled. “Go home, Sunghoon, and show Ethan your wrist. Remind him he was once always called as Heeseung.”

Sunghoon was numb as he walked up the stairs to their apartment. He saw Ethan sitting in the chair by the fire, absently playing with his piano. “Sunghoon-ah,” he said. “I see you survived talking to my brother.”

“Yes,” Sunghoon said. “Your brother.” He paused. “Shim Jake Jaeyun.”

“He told you?” Ethan looked surprised. “Why?”

“Because Lee Ethan Heeseung I've got your fucking first name on my wrist and I didn't even know it was you.” Sunghoon pulled back his sleeve and practically ripped his wrist band off. Feeling more exposed than he ever had been in Ethan, no, Heeseung's presence he held out his wrist and hoped.

With more caution than Sunghoon had expected Heeseung came over and read it. “Oh,” he said. “I didn't think you'd have that one.”

Fascinated Sunhoon watched as Heeseung held out his own wrist and undid the band. There on his wrist, in Sunghoon's messy writing was his name. Sunghoon.

“Why didn't you tell me?” Sunghoon asked.

“It was obvious from the way you reacted you couldn't have my name on your wrist,” Heeseung said.

“Jake said it was because you decided to be Ethan after it appeared,” Sunghoon said. “And that's my handwriting.”

“I didn't realise,” Heeseung said, reaching forward to lightly trace the lettering on Sunghoon's wrist. “This name,” he murmured. “Isn't me.”

“I know,” Sunghoon said, leaning to whisper in Heeseung's ear. “You're Lee Ethan, you will always be Lee Ethan. I just have to look after two names for you not one.”

Heeseung didn't reply in words but cupped Sunghoon's cheek and kissed him.

Some people are blessed with two names; one of their own and one to guard and Sunghoon counted himself doubly blessed that he was to guard the Heeseung of childhood and the Ethan of the present. No fairy would ever steal Lee Ethan Heeseung from his Sunghoon. For Sunghoon always had guarded names well.


End file.
